I Want You Close
by TruestBlue
Summary: He had one of those voices you have to lean in close to hear. You almost feel his breath before you can hear him speak. Whenever I told him this, he'd smirk.Good, He'd say. I want you close.HPDM, sex, lang.,
1. I Want You Close

_A/N: (ahem!) I'm back everyone! With a brand new attack! This is 'I want you close' a new little ficlet that may not last long. I need another bout of inspiration, up to Call it a Love Story standards. But for now... chapter 1!_

_Disclaimer: Not mine. _

_HPDM_

_Dedicated to Black Eyed Wicca! You rock, woman!

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**What started it was his voice**.

It sounded like he was singing, quick little words chasing each other out of his mouth. His annunciation was impeccable. He should've gone into theater.

But then again, no. His voice was so soft. It could never be heard above the roar of an audience. He had one of those voices you have to lean in close to hear. It always seemed so loud, so harsh in public. But when he's himself, when he's real, you have to put your face right next to his to catch everything. You almost feel his breath before you can hear him speak. Whenever I tell him this, he only smirks.

"_Good,"_ He'll say. _"I want you close."_

And I'll laugh, too, and pull him in tighter, and listen to those words, running across his lips and down the air in front of us. I'm always quiet, listening. I'm terrified I might miss something.

He was never very good with the touchy-feely stuff, the emotional stuff. At least, not with talking about it. It's like he says everything, except what he wants to say sometimes. He fidgets when he's held. But I think he likes it.

Sometimes, I listen as he says the most terrible things.

"_I could never love you,"_ He'll hiss. "_You're just going to die soon." _

When he's in one of those moods, I listen. Then I wait. I watch him, silent, as he beats his pale fists on my chest. I move my arms around his middle, ignoring the pain, and he stops thrashing.

He used to try to hide his tears, but he doesn't anymore. He'd look up at me with those tempest eyes of his, and I knew he was lying.

He knew I knew. Whatever worked. I was just as scared about leaving him, as he was of loosing me.

"_I love you,"_ I'd tell him. _"I'll never leave you."_

Oh, but isn't it ironic? I never left him at all. All the battles behind me, all the chaos, all the press. And he left me.

But then, he'd never made me a promise.

I heard he was with a Slytherin girl; who had thick dark hair and dark green eyes. Sometimes I wondered how no one saw the connection. It would've made me laugh, if I weren't so put out about it.

Every week, though, I'd know he was there. Most of the time, he would cry, watching me. Sometimes I would cry too.

"_I want you close,"_ I'd whisper. To the air; to him. But for a year, he never came. I never asked why he left. I never had to.

But on the thirty-first of July, our anniversary, he came. I've never been more surprised to see him. There he was, in all his glory, rainwater running through his hair and down his face. On my doorstep. We stood, for a second, quiet. Neither said anything. No one moved.

"_Harry," _He'd started in. something unidentifiable rose up to my chest, pushing to get out.

It was those words! They were back, and they were faster than ever! They were pouring from that perfect lips, down that perfect mouth, rolling with the rain. I was trying so hard not to cover my ears, not to break down. Just seeing him was too much. A few more words, and we'd be back to where we were. And I would not have my heart broken by the likes of Draco Malfoy again.

"_No!" _I'd bellowed, stabbing my index finger at his broad chest. He was supposed to be the vulnerable one, not me. But who was close to tears? Who was going to melt after a couple of words? I set my jaw, and steeled my emotions.

"_This time,"_ I told him, slowly. _"I'm going to do the talking."

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_A/N: Oh em gee! What will Harry say? I dunno yet. _

_But Review and make me a happy woman!_

_TruestBlue_


	2. Soundless

A/N: Some weirdness ahead... sorry...

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Draco looked at me, and I was almost offended at how surprised he was. He had every right, don't get me wrong: It wasn't like I'd spoken up before. He looked weak for a minute; vulnerable. It was like he didn't know what to do in the face of something new.

"It's probably not smart," I started in, closing my eyes. "To tell you how I feel about you. But, you were always the smart one, weren't you? The composed, graceful one. The one with so much to say. Never let me get a word in edgewise, did you? Well, now, Draco,-" My voice broke on his name. I'd tried to avoid saying it, but the syllables, vowels and consonants were restless on my tongue.

"Have you ever looked away from home, Draco?" I was surprised at my own words. I didn't talk much, but when I did I never knew what was coming.

Apparently, he didn't either.

"Well," He started in.

"This year, I looked away from home and I stepped into the rain. And I couldn't see it! I couldn't see it but I could feel it. And it was light, and clear, so wondrously clear. And it was soundless. Little soundless drops with little woundless worries, with little soundless fears. And the rain, the rain was beating on the windows, fast and terrible. But I couldn't hear it, Draco. Soundless."

Draco's expression didn't change, but I could tell he thought I was crazy. Or on something. What was I talking about? Talking in riddles, figurative language, where was the rain? Did he bring it back?

"Did you notice the rain, Draco? On that day? When it was light, and clear? When it was beating: soundless? I looked away from home, Dray, and it started to pour. And then I could see it, and I could feel it, and I could hear it. And, Draco, it was screaming! Pounding, pelting, raging, pouring, and fierce! Fierce, and wild and wailing!

And terrible."

Draco let his hands drop to his sides, and his lips curled. "What are you on about, Potter?"

I ignored him, him and his words, him and his smirking. I thought of the rain.

"When I stepped into the rain, I could feel it. It was drenching, and beating, and pelting… and it was fierce, so fierce, and wailing like a siren in despair, agony, misery, Draco! But it was soundless. Soundless and clear, and light, wonderfully light, and I couldn't see it. But I could feel it."

Draco peered, as if into my soul, looking for understanding of my metaphor.

Soundless.

But that was okay, I barely understood it myself.

Draco licked his lips, and I watched. He wavered, leaning near my face, daring, wishing…

But I leaned back. And the moment was broken.

"You thought it would be easy. To come back here with your words, win me back. Maybe you didn't understand when I said I'd go nuts, crazy, stark-raving-mad if you left me! Look at me Draco!"

I was screaming. I lowered my voice, crashing from my violent crescendo.

"Look what you've done to me. Spouting off nonsense, looking away from home, feeling the rain."

I shivered and hugged myself. The door was still open, and he was still gaping. Draco moved inside, brushing against me. It was a movement a little too intimate to be considered apathetic.

'How long have you been keeping that in?' Draco's eyes asked the question; he didn't need to.

"Awhile."

He didn't need to speak, I didn't need to hear those quick little words, one by one, launched rapid fire.

I needed, just for a minute, for it to be soundless.

Maybe I then I could collect myself. Regain a little sanity.

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A/N: I know it's weird. I know he sounds crazy. That plays a little bit of a role later. Think Poe.

Anyhow, see you next chapter. I got the last chapter of Call it a Love Story out, so you should go review it. And this, of course. In spite of its weirdness.

TruestBlue


	3. Home Again

_Author's Note: I'm surprised that you don't think I'm dead, I've been gone so long. Here's the next chapter of "I Want you Close," And it may be the last. I'm very sorry about the wait. You may want to go back and read the last chapter, as this has several little references to it. Sorry again,_

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With his hand in my hair, everything regains clarity. My vision's lost its haze around the edges, no longer clouded like an old muggle film. Everything's sharp, and bright.

With his hands on my face, my world turns hot and red. I remember what passion is. I see it, in the way he's looking at me, in the way he's questioning. It's like he's asking permission. I'm grateful for the question, and to see him so unsure. It makes me think he cares.

So, of course, I tell him yes.

With his lips on mine, I find love again. Maybe I never lost it. Love, I think, can break or bend. It may not look or feel the same as it did before, but it's still love.

He moans my name, and my world floods color.

"_Harry,"_

Draco says my name like a blessing and a curse, like it's beautiful and dark and terrible all at once. I've come back home, with my hands around his neck, on his chest, under his shirt. I've come home to Draco's arms, and I'll never look away again. I promise him that in my gaze. I know he sees it.

Outside, the rain stops as Draco drags me to bed. We nearly break the door as we stumble, blindly. Our eyes are bound to each other like magnets; we can't bear to look away. His touch isn't the same as before, but it's better. Draco's warmer than he used to be. He touches me like he knows better than to let me go. I pull him closer.

Draco's mouth moves down the side of my throat, leaving me breathless. Little kisses down my neck make me shiver. He runs his eyes down my gasping form, and nods: it's just the same as he left it. His tongue slips down my torso, soft and worshipful. I scream when he takes me in his mouth, but he's still silent. Staring up at me with pleading grey eyes, I'm mesmerized.

'_See how much I love you?' _His eyes seem to bleed over with emotion. I've never seen him this way. '_See how lost I was without you?' _

I whisper his name, over and over as I move into him. I look down at him, knowing it's my turn to ask permission. So I do. He says something snarky about Gryffindors needing to be noble even in the bedroom. I smirk, and he quiets. Draco knows, as smart as his mouth is, I'll always be in control. He smiles back in mock-innocence.

'_Draco, Draco, Draco…" _

Everything is serious again as I'msliding in and out, listening to him whimper and groan. He bites his lip, and I know it's almost too much for him. He usually breaks eye contact, never allowing himself to feel too much during sex.

"_It's too intimate," _I hear his voice in my head, a memory. "_I'm not a fucking woman, Potter. Sex is sex, love is love. They don't mix." _He was wrong. I'm going to prove it to him.

I pull his face parallel to mine, tell him to open his eyes. He does. I see love there, and I tell him so as I fuck him gently. Draco's only response is a groan from deep in his chest that forces blood from my head to my groin. I hadn't thought it possible to be any harder.

When we come, I know things are different. The earth stops shaking, and I feel still inside. Draco curls around my body and whispers in my ear. Little, quick words telling me how much he's missed me, how glad he is he's come back.

Those words that drove me mad once, they're back. I think they're beautiful.

He has one of those quiet voices; so soft you have to come close to hear. I lean into him, listening.

"_Harry,"_

His lips on mine, I find love again. I know now, that love can break or bend. It may not be the same as it was before, but it could be better. This time, love comes as a whisper.

"_I want you close." _

And who am I to deny him?

I inch closer, stroking his hair. I never noticed, before, how good he feels under my hands.

I listen to his delicate post-sex snores, and smile. I'm home, close to him. I drift off, aware that this love is forever.

Outside, the rain is soundless again. At long last, there's peace for us.

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_TB: Tell me what you thought! How? With a review. _

_Because I've been away for so long, I think I'll grace you with my review song!!!!_

_---clears throat---_

_Here we go!!!_

_"Review, Review,"_

_Said TruestBlue:_

_With a snort,_

_And a giggle to boot. _

_If you find that her writing's_

_Quite sublime,_

_Give her a cyber-hoot! _

_She needs a hand_

_When she gets too bland, _

_Give her lame writing a spark! _

_So review 'till you die!_

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_Umm,_

_Err,_

_And hark!_

_Okay guys! Hit that button!!!_

_--TB_


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